The Order of the Phoenix: Password-mania
by Carrie's Demise
Summary: Dumbledore decides to finally implement Remus's idea after sixteen years. Thing is.. it causes a lot of embarrassment. Rated M for language. (AU for alive!Sirius and alive!Fred)


**A/N: Okay, so I was bored enough that I read over my Password fic. Thing was, as soon as I got to the BANGITY BANG BANG stuff I was howling with laughter. SO.**

 **This fic will mostly contain of various drabbles/one-shots of the many people in the Order. Little twist. They all have their own passwords that were created on accident.**

 **The one I created in my Password 'Verse will be one of the ones I will put in here.**

 **PM me or review any requests!**

 **RRelax &R~**

 **-Carrie**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter. ..If I did Rowling would be dead. SHE KILLED MY REMUS.**

Oddly enough, the password thing for the Order hadn't started recently. In fact, it was after the Knocking Incident that Remus Lupin suggested it to Dumbledore. After praising the brilliance of the young werewolf, Dumbledore had implemented the system. Weeell... he hadn't used it immediately. In fact, he just started it the second time he gathered the old crowd together.

The twist to it?

All of the passwords had to be accidentally made by each person. As Dumbledore summoned the Order, he watched from his little Mirror Orb(1) that lay so innocently on the table in front of him. Rubbing his hands together and resisting the urge to cackle like a madman (he was no Tom Riddle thank you very much), the wizened old wizard eagerly began to see who would be his first victim.

xxxxx

He was tired.

Oh so tired.

Did he mention he was tired?

Bloody goblins! They decided to send him on a dig to the _Bermuda Triangle_ of all places! Didn't they know about the wards there? Those extremely dangerous wards that he had to cut through so painstakingly he collapsed for twenty-four hours afterwards? Grrhh!

Not to mention they required _passwords_ now whenever they wanted to go on a dig-

Wait a bloody moment.

Shite!

Bill Weasley groaned, running a hand through his longish bright ginger hair and glaring at the door in front of him. Muttering angrily to himself, he kicked the door to Grimmauld Place harshly. Almost immediately, Bill began to hop around the doorstep like a rabbit.

"Owww! Fuckit! Owww!" he swore viciously.

"Password?"

Letting out a loud yelp, Bill took a step backwards and almost fell down the stairs. "Bloody hell, Albus!" he glowered at the bright blue eyes that somehow peered out the door. Then he looked confused. "..Password?" Oh. That little-

"Can you just please let me in?" the red-headed Weasley inquired weakly.

"..Nope." Albus's blue eyes twinkled slightly. "..Password?"

"Please?" Bill practically gritted out. Then he added semi-consciously, "I stubbed my toe." He widened his brown eyes for affect and cocked his head slightly.

"Hrmmmm.." The old coot actually sounded like he was contemplating it. Bill perked up visibly. "Hmmm... Nnnhh.."

His eyes widened further.

"..Nope." Albus slammed shut something wooden, before idly sliding it back open and looking outside with one large, bright blue eyeball. "..Password?"

No! Goddammit! Ugh, this was so embarrassing.

"..Fine."

And reluctantly, Bill curled his arms in as if they were like wings. Then he began to flap around, switching from foot to foot in an odd parody of a ballet dance.

Loud squawks (full of embarrassment and shame) erupted from his mouth as he began to sing.

"I'M A LITTLE CHICKEN," his voice rang out embarrassingly loud. "SHORT AND STOUT." He was anything but. "PLEASE CUT MY HAIR OFF, IT'S TOO LONG." He was never going to do this again. "MY BROTHERS LIKE TO KICK ME, WHERE IT HURTS. HOPEFULLY THIS SONG WILL CUT THEM SHORT."

Releasing his arms from the wing pose, Bill began to dramatically flail. "ITSY BITSY BATTY FLYING UP THE WALL. CHASING A MOTH, HOPING TO GET IT CAUGHT. HERE COMES A BIRD, AND DOWN IT COMES IT FLIES. SORRY FOR BATTY, SA-AY GOOD NIGHT!"

His face bright red to match his hair, he listened to the loud snickers erupting from the other side of the wall. "Bloody Dumbledore thinks he's going to get away with it." Bill muttered to himself. "Thing is, he _will._ "

After moping for a moment, the door opened and Bill practically darted in. Snarling angrily at a cackling Sirius Black, Bill Weasley slammed open the kitchen door and proceeded to bash his head angrily against the mahogany table.


End file.
